Skip to main content
SFU Student Undergraduate
Communication, Art + Technology › Communication
Co-operative Education

empty
Girl wearing a pink bucket hat smiling at the camera
The motto that I am living by is something RuPaul excellently describes regarding overcoming your inner saboteur and how to acknowledge your negative voices without succumbing to their control: "You can look, but don't stare."

I never felt that I was good enough from my early years. I was a child that frequently struggled in school. No matter how much I put my heart and soul into projects or homework, I felt constantly knocked down and wondered: "What's wrong with me? Why can't I get this?" In 2013, after numerous days of testing, an answer finally revealed itself: I had a learning disability. Even though I had an explanation, the school struggles did not cease. Soon, I became regularly angry as I would clutch a report card full of C's; at the same time, my friends showed off theirs, complete with A's. Situations like this made me doubt my abilities further, and soon the hesitation started bleeding into my work life.

When I began working, my self-doubt became overwhelming. I constantly battled with poisonous thoughts of how I wasn't good enough and destined to fail. This thinking led to many work errors, which sent my brain into a frenzy. To put it simply: I had no confidence in myself.

A mix of excitement and dread came over me when I was notified that I was accepted into the Knowledge Network Co-op. Unfortunately, my inner saboteur began bubbling up again, and soon I felt miserable. I became sure I was going to butcher the fantastic opportunity I had been given because of my learning disability and self-doubt.

Well, how the turntables...... - Michael Scott

gif of 3 people in an office, one man crosses his arms, text on screen reads "wow, wow, wow, how the turntables"
Credit
BRONLIKEGOAT on Bleacher Report

"You're the fastest learner we've ever had here,” a compliment bestowed upon me from my supervisor during our-midterm check-in. At that moment, I felt that every hardship I had gone through, whether in school or working, had melted away. I was a new person, with a new job and a new attitude that had been recognized for something that I had never thought in my wildest dreams would be noticed.

Working at Knowledge as a Brand Marketing Intern is incredibly affirming; working with social media has allowed me to focus on my strength of being creative. Finally, I feel that my saboteur's loud voice has quieted due to my work habits and efforts. The new environment I explore through social media platforms is eye-opening. I explore strengths I never knew I had, such as copywriting for advertisements or posts. My talents are in writing and creative expression rather than calculating Linear Algebra or memorizing the beginning of the First World War.... and that's okay!

The lesson I learned most about working at Knowledge is that it is genuinely comforting knowing you're on the correct path when you find something you're good at. Another lesson was that it's okay to make mistakes. Not everything will be perfect the first time; it doesn't mean you're not good; it's just maybe looking at a different way of approaching the situation. Approaches that have helped me have been to take care of my mental health by seeking therapy and reminding myself of small achievements I've accomplished, like getting up and making my bed or even having a good hair day.

My saboteur occasionally still rears its ugly head. To this day, I'm attempting to remind myself of my successes rather than my failures. Still, it takes time to focus on the good rather than the negative. I try to stop letting my fears hinder me and accept that I live with a learning disability, but that does not define every aspect of what I do. I've embraced it as a part of who I am, but it only takes up one small part of the rest of the mosaic I call Eden.

The motto that I am living by is something RuPaul excellently describes regarding overcoming your inner saboteur and how to acknowledge your negative voices without succumbing to their control: "You can look, but don't stare."

gif of a someone saying "can I get an amen up here".
Credit
@rupaulsdragrace on Giphy
SFU Student Undergraduate
Co-operative Education

Posts by Author

Headshot of Janvi
Blog
How To Land Your First Co-op

Knowing what I wanted to specialize in allowed me to start making plans for my first Co-op term. In all honesty, getting your first Co-op term can be exciting and intimidating. However, with a little planning and effort, you can position yourself for success.

A pen over a paper with the Fraser Institute logo
Blog
Employer Feature: An Interview With The Fraser Institute's Senior Manager, Development Events

Meet Danielle Fleck, the Senior Manager of Development Events at Fraser Institute. In this quick Q&A, Danielle discusses the benefits of having an intern at the organization, the growth of the interns they hired and how the organization made the interns feel comfortable in their position.

Laptop on a desk next to a plant
Blog
Learning on the Job without an Expert to Guide You

I was the only communication person in my department; there were no experienced communicators to work closely with and learn from. I thought this situation would limit my room to learn, but surprisingly I gained valuable experiences and exercised skills that I didn't expect.

You Might Like These... Co-op Reflections, Professional Development, Career Exploration, Seeking, Work Term Extension

author, courtney, smiling
A Second Term in Government: More of the Same?

Having completed my first work term for Health Canada as a Communications Officer Intern, I was eager to try something new, and the government was not where I believed that was going to happen. That is until I was offered a position at Agriculture and Agri-Food Canada...

picture of glichelle pondering a though
Surviving Workplace Politics

Ever been peeved with workplace politics? Have you ever been a victim of office politics? One student shares her experiences from the workplace with tips on how to survive.

 

person with their head in a book
Responsibility and Success

One of the most memorable parts of my time in co-op was the collection of accidents, errors, mistakes, and mix-ups that happened in the course of working in the laboratory.

 

You Might Like These... Co-op Reflections

christiane with co-workers
March: Arts and Culture

In the winter of 2013, SFU Geography student Christiane Pulluau trekked to La Paz, Bolivia to work with a CED (Community Economic Development) group. She shared her diary entries with us, and we present the third insallment: Arts and Culture in March.

Image of Author. She is standing in front of a black grilled fence while smiling at the camera and wearing a white shirt and black coat.
Diary of a Job Fairy: My Co-op Term at the CRA

Some people dream of having a career in the public service but what is it like to be the person making those dreams come true? Go behind the scenes with Rebecca and read about her experience working as a Staffing Assistant at the Canada Revenue Agency!

Cartoon characters working
How It All Started

Interested in starting a business but don’t know where to start? Don’t know if you can handle it because you’re a student? David has gone through it and succeeded in some ways while failing in others. Learn from his experience in this blog post so you can avoid making the same mistakes.